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Clearing my mind one subject at a time.

By 13:33

Last week or two I have been inside my own head to much, I've been over thinking situations that don't  really need a second thought, I've been stressing over current situations that I have no control or all control over .. and ya know what the biggest issue I've got is wondering why am I not good enough? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not smart enough? Am I not sexy enough? Do I need to wear make up? Do I need to change my personality so I am more girlie? Do I need to draw on my eyebrows? I'm doing my best to try and improve my life, I have goals and have a future planned, i am motivated, I want the best for myself and my future family. I've gone through one of the toughest journeys of my life in the last year and half and still I don't feel good enough, I am extremely proud of myself but never satisfied. I tell myself time and time again I am good enough, one day I'll believe it. 

But Isn't it mad how one person, one human being - can make you feel like you aren't good enough. When really you could be the exactly what he needs. You'll push him to his potential because you know he has it in him, you'll motivate him because you can see his passion, the fire in his eyes, you'll be there to comfort him when everything goes tits up and you'll be there to help pop the cork on the champagne to celebrate his success, but no, he picks the  girl who may not do anything like that. If that's what he wants then he just isn't the right bloke for you, but that's fine, Chin up, straighten that crown and carry on with your growing life. He may realise what his lost. 

See I sit and write this out on a Friday night snuggled up in bed with my poorly pooch. I am happy here, I've had a bloody good work out and I stuffed my face with food. But is that boring? Should I be out getting drunk and dancing? Is that what boys want? ... Who knows. 

This is an all over rant like thing because I have so many things going on inside my head and sometimes you just need to let it out. This is just one of many things that need to get off my chest. 

I am sorry if I've offended anyone in this post but ya know this is how I feel currently, so I'm gonna let it out. 

Have a good weekend folks!

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